비 / Rain

(English Translation is below)

_비_

비가 다시 왔다. 늦잠을 잤는데 오늘 아침에 정신없이 급히 나사거 집에서 우산을 잊어 버리고 왔다.

친구에게 빌리려고 했지만 아무도 연락을 안 받았다. 어쩔 수 없이 학교 근처에 있는 커피숍 안에서 비가 멈풀 때까지 기다릴 수밖에 없었다.

들어가자마자 주문하였다. 커피를 마시지 않아서 핫초코를 주문하였다.

핫초코를 천천히 홀짝이는 동안 오래 전에 산 소설 책을 식탁 위에 놓았다.

조록조록 빗소리를 들으면서 끝까지 그 책을 읽었다.

끝낸 후에 비는 아직도 멈추지 않았다. 커피숍 창문 밖에 하늘을 바라보니 어렸을 때 추억이 문득 떠올았다.

그 때는 오늘처럼 우산이 없고 친구와 집에 돌아갔다. 빨리 가려고 했는데 친구는 천천하고 태연히 걸었다.

사실은 좀 귀찮았는데 그 친구는 ‘매일 하늘 밑에 사니까 왜 이렇게 비가 무섭니?’라고 물어봤다. 그 후에 우리는 비놀이를 같이 하였다.

그 추억 때문에 가슴이 따뜻하게 되었다.

비는 아직 멈추지 않더라도 초코값을 내고 집에 돌아갔다.

좀 젖어도 가슴속에 어린 힘이 가득하게 되었다…

 

_Rain_

Here came again the rain. I went to bed quite late last night so this morning I was hurried to come out and just left my umbrella at home.

I tried to contact my friends. Just wanting to borrow their umbrella but no one answered my call. In the end, I could only wait in the cafe nearby the school until the rain stops.

Right after I entered the cafe, I made an order. And because I don’t like drinking coffee, I ended up just order a cup of hot chocolate. While slowly sipping my hot choco, I put the novel I bought long time ago but didn’t get any chance to finish it.

I finished reading the whole book while listening to the rain drop sound.

Well, I already finished my book, yet it’s still raining outside. I looked out of the cafe window, saw the sky and then one memory from the past just popped up in my head.

It was a rainy day without umbrella like today. One different thing was that I was on the way back home with my friend. I would like to arrive home as fast as possible but my friend just walked slowly and calmly.

I got to be a bit annoyed but then my friend suddenly said that, ‘Everyday you live your life under this big sky. How come you get to be afraid of the rain this much?’

After that, we ended up playing under the rain together like little kids.

Only by thinking of that moment, it helped warming up my heart.

Though it’s still raining outside, I just paid for my hot choco and walked back home.

Getting a bit wet, but deep inside my heart, it’s full of that power.

The power of youth.

 


Well, I supposed to come up with travel entry. But this is the assignment my Korean teacher gave us to do in class last week.

She gave us one word and asked us to write the things that come out in our mind by looking at that word. And we were asked to write the whole story.

This is my story and it started from the word ‘Rain’.

The English translation might be a bit weird since the original version is Korean.

I just really like the feeling of writing and reading this short essay. That’s why I decided to keep it here with other entry.

 

I hope you guys would enjoy the rain once in awhile also.

 

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Dear my inner cycle

After my last school vacation, I buried myself with tons of books and manga. I, suddenly, would like to shut myself out from the world for awhile.  (Well, I still check through my SNS everyday haha! but I don’t really follow any news or drama so crazy as before). Not like I don’t want to know what happened here or there, it’s just I got my mood to dig more in deep side of human. It turned out that I escaped back to my books. Getting to understand human from other way. (Yes, one of those books is Norwegian Wood by Murakami because I want to dig more to human mind. It caused my friend who kept asking for the innocent me that’s he thought already gone somewhere forever.)

In the end, book can cover some. And the thing I got back from indulging myself with literature is my power of concentration which I had lost it somewhere long time ago.

Until the time comes, thanks to my friend helping remind me that I left my blog for long time already.

Updating blog, though it’s one of my pleasure to do, turns to be hard when you feel like your life gets not that much interesting story as before. I didn’t get to travel to some new places, I didn’t get to have exciting trip, I didn’t get to meet much new people. During last vacation, I organized to meet a lot of friends, my professors. Some I consider them far from just normal acquaintances. They are just alike my sister, my brother. Well, I even call one of my friends as another mom! haha

After that, these days, other than books (I rarely study Korean, honestly haha), I spend my time with the group of my closed friends. We cook, we eat, we talk. And yes, we get to laugh a lot because of these gatherings. I have no idea about the other but me, myself, I’m getting to be more calm and stable with myself. I feel so warm deep inside my heart after every dinner we had together and I always get nice, tight sleep by those nights.

Quite strange, but surrounding myself with people I love and feel comfortable with turns to be my current pleasure. This does surprise me somehow. Since normally,  I’m that type of persons who’s super easy to get bored. I prefer new adventure or trip to somewhere rather than daily routine.

Or else, human needs their own circle to keep their battery charged. No matters how many adventurous or interesting stories you have experienced, it doesn’t really mean that much if you have no one you would like to share it with. I might get to travel a lot and experience so much on this world. Yet, if I have to keep all of these experiences to myself, my happiness couldn’t lead up to that level.

The level that could only be reached by sharing with someone.

Besides sharing your happiness with someone, it’s also with whom you share it with. I consider myself for socialized side as onion. (Sound wrong for some reason, isn’t it?) As I said, I’m super easy to get bored. I, thus, bring myself to experience new things. Extra activities in school, exchange program, volunteer activities. All of these got me tons of acquaintances whose some become to be friends, closed friends, and best friends.

When you get to know new people, you learn about them by every factor. Their first impression, their conversation, their interest, their aura you feel. Getting to talk and stay with them a bit more, you’ll learn where to place them in your life.

That’s the way I create my onion. It’s the zone of people around myself. Outer cycle, middle one, and inner one. The inner you are, the more I know they can accept the true me. I can freely be myself with these people. I know that it’s safe and sound enough for them to be there. Mostly these people are always the one whom I would like to share my stories with. In the other way, they always turn to be there when I need someone.

I’m always grateful for having them in my life. But sometimes, I also get to ignore some from my inner circle which the feeling of being ignored turn to hurt me in the same way. Once, I was obsessed, thinking too much on this, considering and blaming myself as those who overlooks the friendship and love my inner circle give to me. Talking with myself for awhile, I patted my shoulder, complementing myself for at least feeling hurtful by this and telling myself to try paying attention and caring a bit more to my inner circle. I’m not that good with it now, still I’m trying my best.

 

Turn out this blog is super long with only the text haha!

I promised to myself to read more and write more. Hope I still can keep this promise to myself.

Until next time. (Not as long as last time, I promise)

 

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(I wonder if the owners of these feet still remember where they were taken and whose they are haha!)

Beauty by the eyes of beholder

“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.”

There are so many times we judge,

We judge that there is nothing in some places.

We judge that there is no good in something.

We judge that there is no reason to even talk with someone.

All is by the reason that ‘they said that…’

Some places, something, someone that we perceived could be so different.

Some places, something, someone always get some hidden beauty inside, waiting for the right one who can see.

It depends on us whether we are open-minded and open our eyes big enough to find it out

or we will just wait for those ‘they’ to keep telling us the information.

Sometimes, if you do not get to perceive directly by your own, you would never be able to judge those things.

Since no matters what, indirect experiences, provided by the others, cannot always tell you the truth that you might perceive it by your own as same as our direct experience.

As I mentioned before,

Beauty is in the the eye of beholder.

So let me ask you one question,

Between the eyes with open-minded and the eyes that already half-closed by bias,

what kind of eyes would be able to perceive the beauty better?

 

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Once in Jinhae

Asking some Japanese where to see the sakura, they might say Ueno Park.

But if you ask some Korean, they’d definitely say ‘Jinhae’.

Jinhae is one small city in the southern park of Korea. You can travel by bus from Busan within only one hour. There is direct bus from Seoul to Jinhae also if you are more comfortable in that way. In my case, my friends and I traveled from Daejeon to Busan by train. We spent one night in Busan and took bus in the morning to Jinhae.

Since this festival is super popular, especially among Korean themselves, it’s my first time seeing this much Korean in only one place. (Over)estimating by my (biased) eyes, maybe exceed one millions. (Haaa) We needed to queue up for everything and we were about to miss the train back to Daejeon because we queued for the bus.

Even though it’s super rush and furious trip, I realized that somehow the meaning of traveling is not where we go but with whom we go with.

The one that can even make our trip more memorable than the destination itself.:)

I wouldn’t talk that much on this entry but I’ll let my cherry blossom show you how nice it was.

PS. Sorry that I broke my promise to update about snow trip but I came up with this cherry blossom as an apology. XD

It’s about the depth not the length.

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Once she stopped rushing through life. She was amazed how much more life she had time for. – Unknown

It’s been a while I didn’t updated my blog. Asking me what I was busy for, my answer would be ‘living my life’.

Right now, I’m trying to slow down my pace. I reduce my schedule for one day. Stop pushing myself by my own deadline that’s too pressured. I’m eating healthier, sleeping more healthier and doing the things that make me feel happier. I travel when my feet ask for some adventure. I even start writing some more articles on the topic that I would like to do for such a long time ago. I’m trying to live my life in more balance way between my duty and my happiness.

In conclusion, I’m trying to make more quality time for myself.

Other than my own private life, I try more to care less about other’s opinion. Joe (from Princess Diary Movie, one of my most favorite forever!) said that “Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent.”. I do agree with him though. I’m living in the way that I prefer to do. No matter what the others think, if they know me well enough, I think they’ll understand and accept me with my own way.

I used to be the one who considers too much on success and failure. But then I realized that none of them is permanent. It comes and it goes. We do learn something from every step of our life. I shouldn’t be afraid of failure and not too overexcited for success. I just need to embrace it as one part of me. The part that makes me who I am for now.

Nothing is useless and nothing to regret.

Short updated for now. I’m coming back after my TOPIK exam in March for last snow blog update from Chungcheon. (Long time ago trip with school haha)

Way to Neverland

Last Chinese New Year, my junior invited me to her apartment to cook and have party with her friends.

After cooking tom-yum without any instant paste for the first time in my life and finishing all of the food we cooked together, we started playing our games.

Almost everyone there was undergraduate students. They are still so young, so wild, so funny, so crazy and a bit insane. haha

Sitting with all of them there remind me my university life and my exchange life in Daejeon three years ago. I was energized sitting there, playing game, laughing with their jokes.

Other day, I went to ice-skating place with them. All of the kids played much more better than me who just slowly moved myself about the skating place. Ended up I fell down three times and I recovered within 3 days.

I didn’t really think that much until the time I went to the bookstore. I got to see one book. It’s about our childhood. From that point, I started to discover more on myself.

Once I got to be asked what kind of person I want to be in the future. It’s really hard question that I had never ever been able to answer it.

On that day, I realized the importance of being youth.

When the world is really big place and there are so many things to wonder around. Together with us, who are still young. Nothing to be worried about. Everything is interesting and chance to learn more on the world. We’re curious about everything around us and we’re not afraid to try.

Sometimes it might get us to hurt but that curiosity is stronger.

I don’t want to lose my feeling of being that energized youth. That’s the type of person I would like to be.

The adult who has never forgotten the youth.

Somewhat this idea reminded me Peter Pan and Little Prince.

Both of them are those people who keep reminding us not to forget the youth but also not to be afraid of being adult.

As Little Prince said, “Growing up is not a problem. Forgetting is.”

Don’t afraid to fall down. Don’t afraid to experience the failure.

Someone that I want to be.

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Message from another me.

New Year just passed but it seems like I got some problems with my time management and my mind turned to be more doomed with tons of thoughts and emotional stuffs I made it up by myself.

Then, while writing my diary yesterday and sliding through my twitter’s timeline last night, I found out one page of my diary two years ago that I took photo and uploaded it on my twitter account in case I want to re-read it again.

I did that since that day I wrote to myself in the future and with that complicated mind, her writing (me in the past) just came at the right time.

This is the message that another me wrote to me.

*****

29.11.2015

I almost finished this diary and our semester is almost done. The tumult happened to me during a short period of time. But when some kind of determination came up, all I can hope to myself is that enthusiasm would not fade away that easily.

Zig Ziglar said that ‘I believe success is achieved by ordinary people with extraordinary determination.’

I would have just kept my extraordinary determination. No need to pay attention to the others’ path, where they would go, or neither how far they are. I’ll just go on my own path. Fast or slow, it would just be my own speed that I can cope with. If I fail, I’ll just do it again. I’ll just keep continue doing it since no matter how the result is I’ll still be alive and can try again as long as I want to. I’ll just do my best with it. Focus on it. I did choose this path by myself. I have to believe and keep the faith on the choice I chose. Even though I might be disappointed because of it, cry, angry, or I might want to give up, one thing I want to tell myself in the future is that you are allowed to be tired, to feel dejected, to feel like giving up, to fall down. But I just want to remind you that you are always able to get up and continue.

Don’t leave your extraordinary determination. It might take short or long period of time to be successful but everything is experience. It would teach you in somehow no matter what.

Don’t lose faith in yourself. Don’t look down on yourself but also stay humble and don’t be vain. Always gather your mind, that’s the important point.

Don’t pay attention to the others, and also the way they look at you. You only need to know who you are and what you are doing. That’s enough.

Remember that only one person that you need to overcome is your own self.

*****

Reading this helped me gather my mind. Everything just suddenly turned to be brighter. I’m still going on my own way, my own speed. That’s enough.

Hardest part for me is I still compare myself with others in some way. This message from another me just reminded me to focus on my own way.

Yes, since everyone is unique and special in their own way. Why I have to compare myself with anyone?

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